Craigslist Maine Missed Connection or Funny COVID Tale?

Every so often it's fun to look through the Missed Connection section of Craigslist. I can't help but wonder if these actually work. Like, if I were to see a cute guy checking me out at the Falmouth Walmart I don't think my first instinct would be to go on Craigslist and see if he's there.

Sometimes there are hidden gems and this one titled, "Heartsick" is a tale for the times.

I'd bet everything I own that this is a story of fiction, but for a moment, let's pretend it's not and break it down line by line.

It was really hot out today. Even inside with AC I was sweating and my muscles felt sore.

(Oh, honey. The sweating I'd give you a pass on, but the muscle aches? Better get that temperature checked.)

So I decided, whats a gal to do but get some ice cream?

(Probably a bad idea with a potential fever.)

I went to an outdoor ice cream stand and it was pretty crowded.

(SOCIAL DISTANCING HONEY. SIX FEET! SIX FEET!)

I ordered a strawberry soft serve.

(Who goes with soft serve on such a hot day? That's be liquid in no time.)

For some reason I've been coughing a lot past few days and I coughed so hard the ice cream fell on my dress : (

(THERE'S YOUR SIGN. GO HOME!)

whatever I couldn't really taste it anyway.

(*sigh*)

The only good part is I made eye contact with a handsome man who took my breath away.

(That's not the man, honey. That's the 'rona.)

maybe it was you? You were wearing a hat and t-shirt.

(Enjoy your quarantine!)

As absurd as the story is, is it all that unrealistic? Stay safe out there!